Lost Thoughts

Lost Thoughts
I lost my thoughts in the waters of baptism.
Ate my ideas with communion drank away my hopes
Smoked up my goals and snorted away my dreams.
Shot up my inspiration fell out of the house in desperation
With numb love
The kind that don’t come from above.
Never touched or validated
We waited,
Equated dollar signs
To I’ve made it!
Got a car, a house, loot and shot hoops.
Intelligent mind like mine
Like phat corna dimes
Confused in the mind can’t keep time
Except in rhyme, I lost my thoughts
But I’m not behind

o.n.e.i.
copyright 2000

Brotherly Love

I come from a place where some see the liberty bell
I face the living hell of digital scales
Hanging in the balance
Of silence no violence
Just-us-you-I and me
Who lurks upon these barren streets
trying to excrete the deepest part of my bowels
I hear the babies’ howl-
did I get here by foul ball or fowl play
Stuck in a three second day
24 minutes remain in the game
4th down and pain Staking
Walks stalks bean pies mixed with chalk against the dark
Moon lit double lines
I look to find a kind of
Peace
That would reach further than a brush
I stroke the pavement and make it my canvas
Yellow as the road in Kansas
Bizarre as it may seem I have subway dreams
Orange and blue I elevate to you my peers
I reside in the city of fear
It wants to tear away my hopes
Burn my vision
Transplant my goals with a deadly incision
Can you feel the tension inching closer around your neck?
Living in a land that has no respect
Crossing all boundaries
The enemy is surrounding me
Living in a hell cell of liberty bell
I weigh my soul on a digital scale lighter than a feather
I lived to tell the tale

o.n.e.i.
copyright 2001

Covert Salacity

Covert Salacity
What would make me touch you in places unheard?
Touch you in places that have no words,
When I see your bodies
I see youth.
They call me pedophile, some say
Sexual or emotional abuse

What a sick mind to lust over babes
Viewing you as an equal, creating mental slaves.
Watching you grow,
Turning into fertile gardens,
Later down the line, I ask you all for a pardon.
Excusing me from my sick thoughts
I never left a scar, how did I caught?
All I ever wanted was to feel close.
Touching you,
In places
I would never boast.
Sending me to a lineup and dictating where I can live
Because I touched your bodies…will you ever forgive?


My void is so deep I cannot fathom my wrong
So I did as they did unto me for so long.
Creating my crazy obsession, my wicked erotic dreams.
“Don’t touch me!”
“It’s not what it seems.”
I’m just longing for innocence, to introduce you to the unknown.
You trust me so much –oh, how our love has grown.
I feel the boundaries crossing as fish swim at sea
Touching your bodies, I want you
Totally
At-ease-let your mind be free,
And I pray you understand and don’t judge me.
I just wanted to hold you tight in the middle of the night.
Perhaps after school,
You know the golden rule.
Don’t yell, don’t tell, your parents trust me
They feel you’re mature giving you a latchkey.
I’ll see you on Sunday on bended knee
We play cousins k-i-s-s-i-n-g.
I won’t take your rejection
I need your connection.
Even if its forces pleasure false affection
I’m aware that this is strange and foreign to your senses
But my strong understanding hand soon convinces
All of you touched by my twisted
Uncontrollable deeds.
I have impregnated you with my dark secret seeds,
Without question. The dirt not manifesting.
Invisible to the naked eye you try to deny the impression
Of guilt, shamefully you wilt
Sucking the life force from your being just as you did me.
I will always have a hold as roots of a tree.
Your anger will grow, always leading back to me,
Less you dare and be bold and keep our bond.
People will always know that you’re my kind.

o.n.e.i.
copyright 2009